Three Kid Circus : A Sort Of Love Story In Four Parts

Saturday, September 11, 2004

A Sort Of Love Story In Four Parts

Part 1: The Beginning

I actually knew the moment I first saw him that he was the man for me. I knew it on a cellular level. I was sick as a dog, ripping open my second box of tissue of the morning. It was also my first day on my new job. He walked into my office, spoke with the office manager, and then turned to say hello to me.

I was in mid-nose-blow. I finished with a *honk* and returned his smile. He was wearing green slacks, and a green and white striped shirt, and when he said "You must be the new Accounts Payable person." I blurted "and you must be a leprechaun." He looked at me like I was from another planet, and I quickly seized another tissue and resumed emptying my nasal cavities. I do love to make a great first impression, you know. That is why my nickname is Silky Smooth. Hah!

I called in sick on my second day, and he left that afternoon for a four week trip to Japan, China, Indonesia and Korea. I threw myself into learning my job, and continued to go out dancing several nights a week with my friends. He wasn't my type, anyway, I figured. Cute, but nerdy. A hard worker, stable, just nice. Really nice. But not for me.

When he returned from his trip, he made the rounds at the company. He had worked there for 6 years, and all the women treated him like a son or a brother. He brought little gifts back for most of the employees, and I was shocked when he stopped by my desk with a funny little plastic swan. It was the size of a quarter, a gold plastic neck and tail with a giant red plastic gem for the body. "Uh, thanks?" I stammered. I was unsure what, if anything, I was supposed to do with a tiny, but very bling-bling swan. I put it on my desk.

Part 2: Plan of Attack

I was still unsure about my apparent crush on this man. He was so nice. And so nerdy. I learned from the office manager that he had been married for 6 months to his college sweetheart, and that she had cheated on him. Broken-hearted, he filed for divorce months before they would have celebrated their first anniversary. Oh, now he was irresistible. He was all vunerable and stuff, which makes my heart go pitterpat.

I knew he wasn't dating anyone. I asked him out. He said he was busy. I shook it off, and tried again a few days later. He declined again, but said he was free the next night. (I later learned that he was blowing me off because he was playing a very involved Nintendo Baseball tournament with his housemate. See, nerdy, but cute.)

He picked me up the next night for our first date. We've been together ever since. Very early in our dating relationship, he was giving me a foot massage, and spent a minute removing lint from between my toes. That is true love, for sure. We moved in together a month later.

Part 3: All about ME

We passed two years together harmoniously. Then his job took an ugly turn. He was ready to move on. I was marking time in temp jobs, not wanting to do much of anything. We flew together to Portland, Oregon, so he could interview for a job. He was offered the job. He was also recruited for a job in Silicon Valley, offering better everything. My heart sunk. I hate Silicon Valley. It's crowded, it's expensive, it's not where I wanted to be. I was willing to move to Oregon, but the thought of moving to San Jose made my stomach burn. I was torn when he decided to take the San Jose job.

I decided that if we got married, I would go, but if not, I didn't want to leave my family and friends. I broached the subject of marriage, and he rejected it out of hand. "I've already been married once, and we're happy, so what's the problem?' I was a mess. I loved him, but I didn't want to move, and he had made his decision. I sobbed in a heap when the moving truck came and took his belongings away. We decided that we would continue our relationship long distance.

We took turns driving back and forth on the weekends. I got busy with a new job, and he was busy with his. I was still sick at heart about the situation. He figured would propose marriage in a few months and it would be fine. I figured that I would give it another month or two, and then I would be breaking it off for good and moving on with my life. We didn't discuss these thoughts. We were living firmly in the present.

A few weeks after a weekend trip to Monterey, I realized that I was late, and took a pregnancy test. In shock, I took 5 more of them. Lined up on my bathroom cabinet, all my wants and fears and demands were quieted. Those two blue lines made all the difference. We were engaged the next week, and I moved to the apartment in Silicon Valley, with the man-made river and the ducks.

Part 4: We Are Family

We were wed in a civil ceremony on September 11, 1998. Our oldest joined the family in March of 1999, followed by our son in September 2000. We thought we were going to take a break, and were surprised by the arrival of our youngest, born on Friday the 13th in December 2002. It's been one thing after another, and we are ever growing and changing in the rapids of family life. There is much humor and love in our house. We are still learning how to navigate, but our raft is sturdy. Six years, gone by in a blink. I'm looking forward to our Lucky Number 7. There'll be no itching here :)