Three Kid Circus : True Identity

Monday, August 09, 2004

True Identity

My 20 month old received her first pair of boots from my mom yesterday. Not just any, boots, mind you - pink cowboy boots with silver stars. This gave my inner cowgirl a thrill, and she seemed pretty darn pleased. She pranced around, giddy at the sight of her twinkin' toes.

Once we got home, she asked me to take them off. I placed them on the hall bench at bedtime.

I waddled into the kitchen this morning with my usual trail of ducklings, and as we passed the bench, the baby grabbed the boots. She wouldn't let me put them on her feet. She wanted them on her arms, where she waved them around like she was conducting an orchestra while singing,

"Winkle, winkle, STAR, wunner ARE, uppa-bubba-HIGH, mmmmmm SKY!" This was followed by an instrumental version, consisting of growling the tune while banging the boots on the cupboards.

(We're still working on the lyrics, obviously. We're thinking American Idol 2018.)

I really need a pair of pink cowboy boots with silver stars. Sometimes you just want to let the world know who you are without saying a word. I can't think of a better piece of apparel that would tell it like it is:

Unbowed by fashion convention.
Likes shiny things.
Values humor above all.
Secretly gallops and slaps hip when no one is looking.
Basically, a dork.
Prone to emitting "Wahoo!" as a multipurpose response.

Of course, I'm sure I'll never get them. Just like I'll never get a tattoo that doesn't wash off or place a bumper sticker on my car. Spend a few minutes with me and decide for yourself whether I'm "SEXY" or that "IT'S ALL ABOUT ME"... no need to rely on my tshirt's opinion.

It's like all these internet quizzes. We all take them. Do I think they tell me anything valuable, or are truly revealing? Heck, no. What country are you? What 80s rock band? What is your flirting style? Are we searching for affirmation of who we are, or looking for new ways to define ourselves?

"Why yes, I'm Ireland. Also, I'm a coy cutie, with a Def Leppard streak." I would love to know if anyone puts this information to good use. It is just another symptom of my flair for wasting time on the internet.